Social media advice: Vaguebooking

Social media advice: Vaguebooking

The gist of it
Many of you will agree how frustrating it is when someone posts something really vague on Facebook:

Example a:
Vaguebooker: sigh today just couldn't get any worse

1. Enabler: :( that sucks you deserve so much better
2. KindOfCares: what's wrong??!?!?
3. Vaguebooker: "oh you know just one of those days. It's a bit difficult to explain
4. OneUp: Yeah it sucks my goldfish died cause I sat on it :(
5. Troll: I just found a video of you....

Example b:

Vaguebooker: Arrrrghh some people XD

1. Enabler: I hope whoever has wronged you rots in hell
2. KindOfCares: who has upset you?
3. Vaguebooker: Just some people really let you down :(
4. OneUp: yeah I know tell me about it. Like today this lady told me I couldn't put my handbag on the train seat. I mean seriously doesn't she know Gucci when she sees it?
5. Troll: I didn't know it was talk like a pirate day?

Example c:

Vaguebooker: so much for my life plans

1. Enabler: i hope u find them again
2. KindOfCares: what's happened? did you loose your job?
3. Vaguebooker: Just some people really let you down :(
4. OneUp: OMG TELLL ME ABOUT IT!!! So I thought I got this new job so I brought myself these sweet ride and then I realised I read the letter wrong. IM SO SILLY :D
5. Troll: I didn't know you had any

What it really means

I have a theory that these kinds of posts are targeted a specific person or small group of people.

If you ever find yourself wanting to go there step back and ask yourself do you really want to be that person? Try talking to a good friend about whatever is bothering you instead. Get their advice and remember real friends don't let friends vaguebook. If this doesn't do it for you try talking to whoever you have the issue with and resolve the issue once and for all. Failing that and you REALLY have to vague book make a custom list of just the people you want to see it. That way no one else will think you're lame :)

Some more specific examples of motivators with advice:

• Your "Good" friends are out on the town without you
• Advice: Perhaps if you stopped being whiny and a proactive friend people will want to invite you places. You have to earn being in someone inner circle, if you've tried and it hasn't worked move on to people who are worth your time. 
• You got rejected  dumped by some guy/girl
• Advice: What do you seriously think will happen here? They'll turn around and realise in fact you're their dream partner because you complain on FaceBook? More than likely they'll breath a sigh of relief knowing they've dodged a whole host of vaugebooks about them. Suck it up princess and move on.
• You were stood up
• Advice: Just reschedule like nothing happened and say you have a present for them! Don't show up and they'll have the gift of knowing being stood up sucks. And you're smarter than them.
• Your ex is parading their new partner around
• Advice: Chances are they have moved on won't even notice you're upset because they're too pre-occupied getting busy with their new biatch. Cut your loses and move on.  Don't whatever you do hire yourself a good looking escort and share your selfie's with the world with a few good "we're so hot", "best couple everrr" or "we're so awesome" comments thrown in for good measure. Your ex probably still won't care and it will get expensive keeping up the act.
• You had a bad day at work and want your boss to feel bad
• Advice: You get paid to be at work so it's expected that it will be hard from time to time. If you have a genuine issue with work speak to your manager about it. Either that or send them something random in the post like some socks. The ensuing drama of deducing where it came from will keep you amused for hours.